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January 26, 2003
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A torrent of soft wings flood
over my closed eyes,
as I see myself from the outside,
dreaming of you.

Butterflies (a million shades of white)
caress my face
and flow around me
like
your love.
:iconrustkill:
Inspired by the image of butterflies in a friend's poem, and by my girlfriend.

Bagpipes and Butterflies
by ~mcivercork
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:iconmusical-nymph:
This is lovely. The image of the butterflies being like rain is so very striking.

Beautiful piece.
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:iconthe-figurehead:
~the-figurehead Aug 10, 2004   Artisan Crafter
I don't know why I haven't commented on this. Probably cause I would have said this. Remember that time we all got attacked by those butterflys? They were just everywhere all of a sudden. And, reguardless of what most people say, they were BITING us.

Just thought you'd like the trip down memory lane.

But, this is a really good graphical poem, where it is so easy to feel and see what you are describing. Great imagery and telling. Simple, short, and very nicely put together.
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:iconrustkill:
I sure do remember those butterflys. They came swarming down from the top oval like a landslide and I definitely know they were biting! hehe.. Those were the days.
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:iconstarquality:
Nice one! i love...it, its just...there and wonderful.
(Irene)
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:iconmcivercork:
Here a very beautiful poem, that touched me! I like it - and I could read it a lot of times!

Is that the right translation of the French?
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:iconkatyj:
I love this poem because it is an incredibly beautiful image, more so because it is beautifully expressed. It's so soft and gentle - I feel like I have been touched by those butterflies as well!
Voici une très belle poème, qui m'a touchée! Je l'aime - et je pourrais le lire beaucoup de fois!
(not really sure why I decided to write that in French, just felt appropriate for some reason!)
Anyway, once again, a great poem Luke! :) (Smile)
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:iconmcivercork:
Whoa!
This has given me a visual image that is incredible potent and unique. I can see it all... and that is certainly a rare quality in a poem.

'as I see myself from the outside,
dreaming of you.'

This is allround good. Simple in language, complex in image, heart-felt in emotion...

I can't help smiling, as butterflies would tickle my eyes...

+fav
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